YouTube Transcription #59 Blackadder

Here is a scene from Blackadder II, in which Blackadder (Rowan Atkinson) is constantly trying to appease Queen Elizabeth (the first), in order to marry her and get enormous power. She had said that she would marry en explorer, so he sailed around the world…

Queen Elizabeth: Where is Captain Rum?
Blackadder: Erm, bad new, m’lady. Rum is dead.
Percy: Do not despair, good woman. He died a hero’s death, giving his life that his friends might live.
Blackadder: And that his enemies might have something to go with their potatoes.
Nursie: Do you mean they put him in the pot?
Blackadder: Yes, your fiancé was only a third-rate sailor, but a first-rate second course. However, we did manage to save something of him, as a memento, so…
Nursie: Oh, my lucky stars. I shall wear it always to remind me of him.
Blackadder: However, ma’am, I am now returned, and my mind cannot help remembering talk of wedding bells.
Elizabeth: No, I’m completely bored with explorers, and if you haven’t brought me presents I’m going to have you executed! I only let Raleigh off because he blubbed on his way to the block! Presents, please!
Blackadder: Ah, yes, ma’am. Erm, yes. Well there was one thing, ma’am – a most extraordinary gift from the island paradise we visited…
Elizabeth: Hurry up! What is it?
Lord Melchett (Stephen Fry): A stick.
Elizabeth: Is it a stick, Lord Blackadder?
Blackadder: Erm, yes, ma’am, but it is a very special stick because when you throw it away it comes back!
Elizabeth: Oh, well, that’s no good, is it? Because when I throw things away I don’t want them to come back! You! Get rid of it!
Percy: Certainly, ma’am.
Elizabeth: What else have you bought?
Blackadder: Erm, yes, well there was very little time, what with picking the weevils out of biscuits…
Elizabeth: Melchett, what did I do with that spare death warrant? Oh, Edmond, it’s wonderful! But what about Melchy and Raleigh? You must have brought something for them as well?
Blackadder: Erm…
Elizabeth: Nursie’s got her beard, I’ve got my stick… what about the two boys?
Blackadder: Erm, yes, yes. Erm, well there was… ah! There was one thing, ma’am.
Elizabeth: Good.
Blackadder: Erm, a fine wine. A most delicious beverage.
Elizabeth: Have a taste, boys, and tell us what you think.
Raleigh: Oh, it certainly has plenty of nose.
Melchett: Oh, yes, this is very familiar.
Blackadder: I’m sure you’ll be glad to hear there is an inexhaustible supply of it.

Expressions used:
“Blub” means to cry.
“Nose” is a term used to mean “bouquet” or “aroma” when describing wine.
“M’lady” means “my lady”, a title used when talking to high status woman.
“Ma’am” means “madam”, the title used when talking to the Queen. Generally, the first time one talks to the Queen you say “Your Majesty”, and thereafter “Ma’am”. I hope this will be useful advice!
“My lucky stars” or “Thank my lucky stars” means “That’s lucky”.